The Sun and Its Effect on Trauma

sun, emotional health, psychology, valley of grace, trauma, ptsd, emotional health, mental health, healing, from broken relatinships to resilience and flourishing

Part 1: The Sun and Its Effect on Trauma

When we think of the sun, we automatically think of its natural ability to provide us with Vitamin D. And boy does it make a difference when it is out as opposed to when it’s not, especially when we are talking about a day like today in the Midwest where it is super windy. Have you ever stopped to think about the sun and its effect on trauma? If not, and you think you are alone, think again. I hadn’t given it that much thought until about eight years ago to be exact.

sun, emotional health, psychology, valley of grace, trauma, ptsd, emotional health, mental health, healing, from broken relatinships to resilience and flourishing
The Sun And Its Effect on Trauma-Photo by Tomas Hustoles at Burst by Shopify

After having a series of events that led to compounded trauma, I started noticing that the sun has a tremendous effect on how I am feeling once the seasons are nearing a significant change. It is so much so, that it can be disorienting. The sun itself is the main trigger, but surprisingly, what goes along with it is the manner and angle at which it is shining, etc. that makes it a trigger.

Part 2-The Sun and Its Effect on Trauma

For example, two weeks of last month was a challenge for me when the sun came out. Thankfully, I had my toolbox available and ready. As I sat at the table taking notes for my class, I observed how beautifully the sun was shining through the kitchen window. I also noticed that my body was having a reaction to it. The birds were singing their tune, and it sounded so pretty, yet something seemed off.

I knew that being still long enough would give me the answer. While listening to the teacher, I reminded myself, “This is a trauma trigger. The source of the sun causing havoc will soon be revealed.” And in no time it did. My mind went back to something that happened literally twenty-four years ago, on my birthday, when I had to rush and leave work because I thought I was having a heart attack, only to find out a few months later. Along with this revelation came the feelings along with it, as I sat there at the table.

Part 3-The Sun and Its Effect on Trauma

I allowed myself to feel the loneliness that I felt back then, allowing myself to remember it, and the emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual toll that it took on my health; but then also reminding myself that it happened in the past. I could lean in, discover the origin, feel it, and then process, and move on with my day.

In the comments down below, would love to know if you have noticed how the sun and its presence triggers your trauma. If so, how were you able to get yourself back to a point of resiliency?

Thanks and be blessed y’all.

Katina

The Danger of Burnout

Black Bean Penne Pasta with Tomatoes

At Valley of Grace, we believe in thriving. In order to thrive, we have to begin grounding ourselves in our identity. The first step in making this happen, is dealing with the effects of our childhood wounds. Click here to get started in Online Therapy today.****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.

Are you saying to yourself, “I’m sick and tired of being in this state of languishing!” , but you are confused about how to get out? You need someone to walk you through the process, step by step. That’s what the course Broken Pieces is all about. This course walks you through with personalized videos, getting you to the heart of the matter. ****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.

Episode 100: The Danger of Burnout

resilience, episode 100, the danger of burnout, compounded trauma, rest, workaholic, podcasting community, podcasters, lifestyle, broken relatinships, brokenness, flourishing, psychology
Healing Our Brokenness
Episode 100: The Danger of Burnout
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Have you ever been tired? And not just tired, but more like exhausted? And on every level? Did you know that emotional exhaustion can lead to burnout?

Burnout isn’t something that comes out of the blue. It is a slow process that has been happening over time. Catching it and being proactive about dealing with the symptoms helps to build up resiliency, giving you a collection of tools that you can used in case the problem resurfaces. We are not God where we know what can tip us over the edge. However, we can get to know ourselves better so that we can know our limitations, and prevent the entire process itself from unraveling. For the podcast on the Gift of Limitations, you can check that out here. If you missed the last podcast interview with podcast host and ministry of music Christen Clark, you can catch up on that here.

resilience, episode 100, the danger of burnout, compounded trauma, rest, workaholic, podcasting community, podcasters, lifestyle, broken relatinships, brokenness, flourishing, psychology

Podcast Topics

  • My Emotional Exhaustion
  • Elijah’s Emotional Exhaustion
  • What Are You Noticing About Yourself?
  • Solutions for Dealing With Burnout

Scripture Reading to Focus on:

1 Kings 19

Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the Lord, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. 12 After the earthquake came a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. 13 When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.

Then a voice said to him, “What are you doing here, Elijah?”

At Valley of Grace, we believe in thriving. In order to thrive, we have to begin grounding ourselves in our identity. The first step in making this happen, is dealing with the effects of our childhood wounds. Click here to get started in Online Therapy today.****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.

Are you saying to yourself, “I’m sick and tired of being in this state of languishing!” , but you are confused about how to get out? You need someone to walk you through the process, step by step. That’s what the course Broken Pieces is all about. This course walks you through with personalized videos, getting you to the heart of the matter. ****This is an amazon affiliate link where a commission is paid to offsite the cost of providing this information to you.

Podcast Transcription

Part 1A

Speaker 0 00:00:11
Speaker 1 00:00:55 This is the Healing Our Brokenness podcast where we dissect problems and solutions that exist among broken people, living in a broken world. And we also believe here at healing our brokenness podcast, that we are going from broken relationships to resilience and flourishing.

Have you ever been tired? Not just tired, but more like exhausted and on every level, did you know that emotional exhaustion can actually lead to burnout and burnout Isn’t something that just comes up out of the blue? It’s a slow process. That’s been happening over time, catching it and being proactive about dealing with the symptoms helps to build up the resiliency.

And it gives us a collection of tools in our toolbox that we can use in case the problem resurfaces. Again, we’re not God, and we cannot know every single time what’s going to tip us over the edge. However, we can get to know ourselves better so that we can know our limitations and we can prevent the entire process from unraveling like a domino effect.

Part1B


Speaker 1 00:02:22 For further explanation on limitations, the podcast called the gift of limitations, would be a great resource. And that one goes into more detail on being able to understand our limitations and to respect them.

It was about four years ago, I guess I would say really five. When I think about it from the period of 2016 to 2018, I had maybe four episodes of being emotionally exhausted. And, these episodes occurred because of a combination of compounded trauma, my own trauma, my kids’ trauma, supporting them, the trials I was going through at the time, etc. A lot of it being financial.

And what happened was, there were several nights in a row where I had not slept well, and when I say not sleeping well, two to three hours of sleep, four nights in a row. And I knew by night number three, I had basically maxed out.

I looked like I was depressed. And when my daughter saw me, she said, are you okay mom? And I said, yeah, why not? You ask? She said, Oh, you just look like you lost your best friend. And so I went and looked in the mirror and I was like, Oh wow, I look a hot mess. Even when my son came in the door, he said, man, you look jacked up.

” Oh, thank you.” And I laughed it off, but I really was not in a good state at all. Yes, grief had gotten backed up. And so between the grief and the insomnia together, it was just a bad mix. It was straight from the pit of hell, literally. And so we all know that when we don’t get enough sleep, it ripples down to other things, it can lead us to be more emotional.

Part two


Speaker 1 00:04:30 And then on the other hand, when we’re more emotional and we have all of this stuff built up in our system, particularly grief that can also lead to sleepless nights because once we max out, our bodies are going, “we’re done”. We’re not going any further until I get enough of it out and then you can rest. And so that’s exactly what was happening too. I mean, just emotional exhaustion.

It did not lead to burnout, but yeah, could have had I not paid attention to my body and kept going due to all of those issues that I was dealing with at that time. And a lot, the people that I’ve heard speak on burnout, particularly ministers have mentioned about the spirit of cynicism coming in when burnout is approaching. A friend of theirs noticed and mentioned something to them about them getting depressed about some of the things that they would normally do.

Part Three


Speaker 1 00:05:30 They were not satisfied with anything. They found themselves feeling unfulfilled and just being cynical about everything being the beginning of it, along with the emotional exhaustion and the inability to rest. What I did when I felt the extreme emotional exhaustion coming on is this: I followed through the script, the one that Elijah did, basically, just to be honest with you.

Because of all of that in my soul and the despair and fear set in, I rested, poured into scripture, Bible studies, podcasts, sermon messages, music nonstop all day long for several days in a row to help me get back up. And even though I eat healthy, I made sure I ate extra healthy, and doubled and tripled up on teas those days. I was able to get back up within a few days and I was just like myself again. And with Elijah, he had been in battle.

Part Four


Speaker 1 00:06:37 He had gone through miracles. He performed all these miracles, killed all of these false prophets and had just run and run and run and run. So he ran himself out. So he finally sat down. It was like, ah, and he finally realized that, I guess I would say, realized the state that he was in. And then that’s when his soul expressed the despair, “Oh,, God I’m ready to die!”

And that’s how I knew I was not myself because inside I was like, “Oh, this is horrible! I can’t take it any more!” And it’s like, it’s one thing to be angry or bitter or resentful about something. Those are different emotions/feelings. So I knew something was off. And with Elijah, God told him to eat, eat, and then sleep and rest and then eat and then sleep again because he was going to need to be rested up for his journey.


Speaker 1 00:07:37 And sometimes we want to just do a quick fix and go on. And sometimes it is a quick fix, but sometimes it’s not. And, we have to give ourselves grace those types of situations. The way the Holy spirit works is really something else. Because after I dealt with this, might’ve been no time after emotional exhaustion occurrence number two, I saw someone else. And as soon as I looked at their face, I knew what that particular person was going through. And like I had the screaming voice inside, their outer voice said,” Oh, this is happening again!”

Part Five

They were filled with despair. And I responded, “you know what? Rest for about two weeks. And then we’ll talk. ” I had to set that boundary. I knew how I was in that condition. It would not do me any good to try to reason with someone who’s in that state, the state I had already been through and knowing what the end result was of being in that state. And I did empathize. I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. I hope you feel better, but this is when we can talk.

And so, when we’re not sitting still long enough, outside of having emotional exhaustion, giving ourselves margin, we don’t have the capacity to tell something is off, to know our limits, to question what is going on inside our souls. We just keep pushing till we can’t push anymore. Then Burnout!

Speaker 0 00:09:14 Sometimes we need someone else to notice like I did with my friend. Just saying, “You know what? You don’t look so well. And so in that case,

Part Six


Speaker 1 00:09:28 Listen to what they say. That’s when we know we have to set up boundaries and we have to take preventative measures for the sake of our own wellbeing. Resiliency happens when we are resting on a regular basis as part of our rhythms. If we are not giving ourselves margin, saying yes to everything that everybody asks us to do, not saturating ourselves in God’s word we will max out. Computer networks only have a certain bandwidth. So do we. In different seasons, different trials, and different ages and stages.


Speaker 1 00:10:08 Our abilities and goals and responsibilities can change off and on. They can change from one day to the next. We just never know.
what could be the tipping point, but we want to be able to bounce back with resiliency, and that way, each time emotional exhaustion hits, it will be less intense.


Speaker 1 00:10:20 Your brain and body will thank you and say, “I know what to do. Been there. Done that.” After healing, If we get stuck in, “Man. I can’t believe that happened. Oh my goodness. I can not believe that happened”, we could just sit in that forever. Kind of like when I would wake up late for work. And I’m just like 20 minutes in the bed because I am stuck in “I can’t believe that this happened. “

Finally, I snap myself out of it by saying, “Ok Tina, you overslept. Now what?” Then, I get up and get moving.
Speaker 1 00:11:16 With our souls will be joyous and glad that we did that. And so, God gave Elijah his next steps when Elijah came out of his near burnout, it was like, “okay, what do I do now?” And God was like, “you appoint this person. You appoint that person. You appoint this person.” Basically Elijah was not going to be doing all those things on his own anymore.

Part Seven

And a lot of times we get to the point that we get to because we’re trying to do too much and try to do too much on our own. So we can either take three days of rest or two weeks of rest to bounce back and become resilient, or we can take the whole year off. And the end of the day, it is up to us how we want to take care of ourselves and how we want to continue to flourish in our relationships. I am so preaching to myself right now. I promise you.


Speaker 1 00:12:09 Whether it’s at home, church, work, in ministry, wherever it is that we’re doing, we want to be able to continue to flourish. We want to be able to continue being resilient with self-care, yielding, and resting in God is part of that resiliency, those are parts of the formula. And we cannot leave that out. So I hope something said resonated with you. And I just want to thank you so much for listening in to every episode. I’m at one hundred episodes.

This is number 100 episode and I praise and thank God. I’m kind of in shock. You know, I know that it’s been a road getting here, but still the fact that it’s the 100th episode. I praise and thank God! And I also want to give a shout out to Timothy Horton for bringing the intro and outro music to us every week.

Speaker 1 00:13:03 And that song is entitled Valley of Grace. And it can be found wherever music is sold. Healing Our Brokenness podcast is on iTunes, Spotify, YouTube, and on Amazon music, etc. So if this is blessing your life in any kind of shape, form or fashion, if you could please give a shout out to your friends, your neighbors, your family members, and ask them to follow us.

Until Next time.
Valley of Grace music.
Speaker 0 00:14:03 , .

Episode 97: An Interview with Eston Swaby

Eston Swaby, validation, identity, rejection, episode 97, approval, money coach, healing our brokenness, confidence, brokenness
Healing Our Brokenness
Episode 97: An Interview with Eston Swaby
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Have you ever wondered why you find yourself in the same patterns of behavior when it comes to dealing with rejection? Even more so, have you taken the time out to figure out the root cause of these issues? And if you have, what is stopping you from moving forward? Tune in to the interview that I had with Coach Eston Swaby to find out how he moved from the end result of rejection to where he is now. In case you missed my last interview with Jennifer Uren, the podcast host of This Mom Knows, you can catch that one here, and if you are looking to connect with Coach Eston Swaby, you can find him out on Facebook. Have a blessed Thursday, and I hope you enjoy the episode!

Eston Swaby, validation, identity, rejection, episode 97, approval, money coach, healing our brokenness, confidence, brokenness
Money Mindset Coach Eston Swaby

Podcast Topics

Money

Money and Mindset

Validation

Approval

Community

Unhealed and Healed Brokenness Affecting Writing & Speaking

Home

What Does Brokenness Mean

Identity

Fun Questions

Podcast Transcription

peaker 0 00:00:01 This is the healing our brokenness podcast, where we dissect problems and solutions that exist among broken people, living in a broken world. And we also believe that we’re going from broken relationships to resilience and flourishing, and the title of this episode is An interview with Eston Swaby. On yesterday, I was blessed with interviewing mindset coach Eston Swaby.

We talked about some of everything: his profession, how he came to be in the ministry, what brokenness means to him, etc. He shared his story, how community plays a role in healing our brokenness, how he unhealed and healed brokenness affects writing and speaking, and what the word home means to him. And then we got a chance to do some fun, personal questions, a lot of what we talked about centered around identity, validation, approval and rejection. And so without further ado, I am going to let you tune in to the interview between Eston Swaby and I.

Speaker 0 00:02:51 Okay. So.
Speaker 2 00:03:00 I worked with Kristin and Jacqueline, in the marketplace, they are the ones to make a big difference, sharing their message can be a gift because of peers and limiting beliefs. We are afraid of asking for what we want and really putting ourselves out there.

And if you don’t mind me asking, what are some of those negative beliefs? Okay.

So, limited beliefs that I, I’m not good enough. I’m not worthy.
It’s not going to work out. Money is the root of all evil. If I make lots of money, then I cannot be spiritual at the same time. And, so some of those limiting beliefs that’s really hold them back from really becoming the person that God has called him to be in the marketplace. I think the biggest one is that they believe that they are not more than that.
Speaker 2 00:04:30 Yeah. I know when you are in business to make more gains. And so part of that so really makes sense. So if you think about the word brokenness, what does that mean to you?

It is not a part of a whole.

So that, that stops. So that stops you from really becoming your true self. That is true.

Now, would you please share with the audience, your story?

Okay, so I was rejected, and because of that rejected, I thought I couldn’t achieve certain things. And so for many years, I thought that there was something wrong.

Speaker 2 00:06:30 So I said to myself, you know what, my life is not important.
When I looked in the mirror all I saw was brokenness. All I saw was someone that wasn’t, that wasn’t good and that no one knows. So what, what’s the purpose of living to see another day?

I wanted validation from outside sources, instead of looking internally, everybody need to really look into who does it say I am, right? So if people didn’t approve me, if people didn’t accept me, then the cause of my self worth was based on other people, and it was more painful, and necessary that I reach out to myself.

Speaker 2 00:08:19 Yes, exactly. And you know, when God called me. I thought that God must be crazy because there’s no way with this broken person. You know, sometimes we are in the position. I spoke for many years, I was sitting in the ministry. I was in ministry, but then I wasn’t behaving in a way that was. I was playing smaller when I started. And even when I started my business, that was the same thing. I wanted success. But at the same time, I never thought that I was deserving. I was done.

So the past experiences dealing with rejection, were you able to come out of that?
Speaker 2 00:10:04 Um, yes. I was able to come out with really the word of God, that is how. I’m not going to let people say I’m not good enough.

That is so true. Uh, why do you think that people stay in their brokenness for so long?

Because there’s some need that has not been met. Um, there are basic needs. The needs are safety, and physical needs. A person that stays in brokenness is believing something programmed in their minds.

Speaker 2 00:11:44 So it was all important too. And how you say it, as far as the mind and programming to think a certain way. And once we have those thoughts in our heads, then we will start to act on it. That’s how it works out.

Yes. That’s exactly how it works because everything starts when something happens, right. When you start a new experience, and someone rejects you, then you say, okay, maybe I’m not good enough. It starts with thoughts then creates emotion then emotions and the emotions creates limiting belief creates a behavior that may sense those thoughts. We internalize. Exactly, exactly. The reason we internalize what people say is because there is something broken inside of you.

That makes sense. It makes me think about as a teenager, how my self esteem was low and I already had thoughts about myself. And then when I heard another teenager, a teenage girl confirmed what I was already wrestling with, then I said, Oh, this must be true.

Speaker 2 00:14:43 WE have to go back to our thoughts. Those original beliefs.
Remember our success, love, joy and everything.

Yes. That is so true, man. That is some good stuff. So did, um, how do you think community plays a role in healing brokenness? And then the second part of that question is how did it play a role in healing, your brokenness?

Speaker 2 00:17:10 Okay. So, um, community is very important. Every day. You surround yourself with people. WE need to be with people with similar beliefs. Right? Right. For example, you maybe go to the church, and there are people who are broken and negative, and you say, I’m not ready for success. I feel that I believe that I’m not good enough for their success. If you can not start surrounding yourself with people that tell you that you are worthy, that speaks life into your spirits or that believe in us, even when we don’t believe in ourselves, keeping that sees greatness in ourselves.

And that is true. And that’s the same thing that happens with me because I started to hang around people that didn’t treat me as the person who wanted to achieve certain goals.
Speaker 2 00:19:14 I started surrounding myself with other people who switched my mindset. They say that you are the sum total of the five people that you hang out with. Like with children. Their parents and family are those five people. That’s what determines who they are. And when you have this resilience, if you allow yourself to be shaped by your environment and the environment is going to shape you.

That is so true. How do you think healed both healed and unknown brokenness affects writing and speaking.

They a reflection of where you are. So if you are, let’s say, if you are writing a personal book, right. And you haven’t healed from your mess from rejection and maybe sense things that you are going to say, others will say, “they have an angry soul, right”?
Speaker 2 00:22:26 Because you’re writing from a place of brokenness, messiness. Writing should be refreshing. I’ve seen that personally in my own writing. I had to release certain people. Then I was able to read and write from a place of reflection and healing.

That is so true. Yes. Yes. That is so true. Now we got another question and that is, what does the word home mean to you?
Speaker 2 00:24:01 An internal place of safety. Not frustration or fear.

Speaker 2 00:26:47 Yes. I see what you’re saying.

Just so focused on either like the material aspects, being prominent, the money, the wealth, and not doing it because it’s what God has planned for your life. Regardless of if it’s gonna bring about a lot of money, a lot of fame, you have a lot of social media followers. That’s not the goal.

Yeah, exactly. I got some fun questions for you to answer. What are some of the books that you are reading now?
Speaker 2 00:27:45 Okay. I’m reading a book by Joyce Meyers surrender.

Oh, wow. And what are some of the things that you do to fill up your soul?
Speaker 2 00:29:26 I read my bible and hang out with positive people, start off by reading my Bible in the mornings.
Speaker 2 00:30:57 What do you think you would do to make a difference in the world?
Coaching. Where can people find you? Okay. The best place to find me is on Facebook. I’m on Facebook, my website, I’m really working on my website. Also. You can always reach out to me.

Wow. Okay.
Speaker 0 00:32:41 Thank you so much for your time. I’m so glad we were able to get those connection issues resolved. This has really been good. I appreciate it. So the healing brokenness podcast, episode 97 and interview with coach Eston Swaby.

Speaker 1 00:34:19 .

So, I hope it was something that was said here today that will resonate with your hearts as you go from broken relationships to resilience and flourishing. I want to give a shout out to Timothy Horton for bringing the intro and outro music to us every week.


Speaker 1 00:13:03 And that song is entitled Valley of Grace. And it can be found wherever music is sold. Healing Our Brokenness podcast is on iTunes, Spotify, YouTube, and on Amazon music, Stitcher, Google Podcasts, Apple Podcasts, etc. So, if this is blessing your life in any kind of shape, form or fashion, if you could please give a shout out to your friends, your neighbors, your family members, and ask them to follow us.

 Valley of Grace.

Black Folk Don’t Do Therapy

therapy, psychology, emotional health, mental health, black people, emotions, poetry, poetry community, angry black man, angry black woman, healing, slavery, post traumatic stress syndrome, post traumatic slave syndrome, showing emotions is a luxury, black lives matter

One of my goals this year is to dive into black poetry and literature at a whole ‘nother level. Doing so has helped me in healing, as well as being able to aide me in one of my current book projects: writing a 300 page poetry book.

As with any particular group of people, you can’t assume that what works for one, works for all. As a whole, there is a stigma behind black people doing therapy. This poem deals with that stigma, and hopefully will get some of us to open up at a deeper level. Due to blacks having to suppress their emotions way back from slavery times, it is both difficult, and deemed as unsafe for them to show their emotions in front of others.

therapy, psychology, emotional health, mental health, black people, emotions, poetry, poetry community, angry black man, angry black woman, healing, slavery, post traumatic stress syndrome, post traumatic slave syndrome, showing emotions is a luxury, black lives matter

The reality of the situation is that when blacks show emotions, particularly that of anger, we are labeled as the angry black man or woman, having a higher chance of the police being called. What is natural for others is a luxury when it comes to black people, and demonstrating emotions goes along with that.

I hope that this poem gives you some food for thought. I would love to start a discussion down below on your experience growing with emotions, and how it was handled. Be blessed!

Black Folk Don’t Do Therapy

Black folk don’t do therapy

We pray and we cry

Yep we cry in private

But in public our tears run dry.

Black folk don’t do therapy

We’re strong as a people

We just slay in the Spirit

Till our Prayers hit the steeple

Black folk don’t do therapy

We just hope and we pray

That our unhealed

Brokenness

Will up and leave us some day

Black folk don’t do therapy

‘Cause we think it’s a sin

If we bring down from

bondage

Generations had to win

Black folk must do therapy

‘Cause then we can negate

Ev’ry game that’s been

Played

‘Gainst the enemy

Called hate.

Black folk must do therapy

Till we break all devices

That’s been sewn

Into seeds.

Then planted

With preciseness

Black folk must do therapy

So our kids

Will one day see

That our growth,

Faith, and healing

Was a bicycle

Made For me.

Black History Part 2

Black History Part 1

Episode 76: “The Time is Now” An Interview with Evangelist Bernina Davis: How Obtaining Multiple DUI’s Led to A Divine Appointment with the Creator in Jail & The Ministry of Evangelism-Part 2

psychology, alcoholism, mental health, mental health, physical health, deliverance, Joseph, Egypt, podcast, episode 76
Healing Our Brokenness
Episode 76: "The Time is Now" An Interview with Evangelist Bernina Davis: How Obtaining Multiple DUI's Led to A Divine Appointment with the Creator in Jail & The Ministry of Evangelism-Part 2
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Just when you thought that the story was over, it isn’t. There’s much more to come. As a recap of yesterday, when I interviewed Evangelist Bernina Davis, she took us on a journey of the importance of relationships and connection, having a relationship with God, knowing God and knowing self, and along with this knowing, being able to put your revelations into practice during this pandemic. She also took us through some of her family traditions around blackness, and the importance of not blindly following our passions, but following them with purpose, drive, and intent. Lastly, Evangelist Nina began the journey of taking us through her brokenness, explaining the importance of not turning others into idols, and the things that women often do that create this type of destructive behavior. Today, we are going to continue her road of redemption and grace that God gave her as she found herself in a situation of being arrested by the police. Listen in and find out how God made this pivotal moment in her life a divine rescue from brokenness and divine calling for life.

psychology, alcoholism, mental health, mental health, physical health, deliverance, Joseph, Egypt, podcast, episode 76
Part 2: An Interview with Evangelist Bernina Marbury

Podcast Outline

  • Brokenness: Evangelist Bernina Davis’ Testimony Cont’d
  • Bible Verses for Meditation: Genesis 39

When Joseph was taken to Egypt by the Ishmaelite traders, he was purchased by Potiphar, an Egyptian officer. Potiphar was captain of the guard for Pharaoh, the king of Egypt.

The Lord was with Joseph, so he succeeded in everything he did as he served in the home of his Egyptian master. Potiphar noticed this and realized that the Lord was with Joseph, giving him success in everything he did. This pleased Potiphar, so he soon made Joseph his personal attendant. He put him in charge of his entire household and everything he owned. 

The Time is Now: Joseph Part Two

From the day Joseph was put in charge of his master’s household and property, the Lord began to bless Potiphar’s household for Joseph’s sake. All his household affairs ran smoothly, and his crops and livestock flourished. So Potiphar gave Joseph complete administrative responsibility over everything he owned. With Joseph there, he didn’t worry about a thing—except what kind of food to eat!

Joseph was a very handsome and well-built young man, and Potiphar’s wife soon began to look at him lustfully. “Come and sleep with me,” she demanded.

But Joseph refused. “Look,” he told her, “my master trusts me with everything in his entire household. No one here has more authority than I do. He has held back nothing from me except you, because you are his wife. How could I do such a wicked thing? It would be a great sin against God.”

The Time is Now: Joseph Part Three

10 She kept putting pressure on Joseph day after day, but he refused to sleep with her, and he kept out of her way as much as possible. 11 One day, however, no one else was around when he went in to do his work. 12 She came and grabbed him by his cloak, demanding, “Come on, sleep with me!” Joseph tore himself away, but he left his cloak in her hand as he ran from the house.

13 When she saw that she was holding his cloak and he had fled, 14 she called out to her servants. Soon all the men came running. “Look!” she said. “My husband has brought this Hebrew slave here to make fools of us! He came into my room to rape me, but I screamed. 15 When he heard me scream, he ran outside and got away, but he left his cloak behind with me.”

16 She kept the cloak with her until her husband came home. 17 Then she told him her story. “That Hebrew slave you’ve brought into our house tried to come in and fool around with me,” she said. 18 “But when I screamed, he ran outside, leaving his cloak with me!”

Joseph Put in Prison

19 Potiphar was furious when he heard his wife’s story about how Joseph had treated her. 20 So he took Joseph and threw him into the prison where the king’s prisoners were held, and there he remained. 21 But the Lord was with Joseph in the prison and showed him his faithful love. And the Lord made Joseph a favorite with the prison warden. 22 Before long, the warden put Joseph in charge of all the other prisoners and over everything that happened in the prison. 23 The warden had no more worries, because Joseph took care of everything. The Lord was with him and caused everything he did to succeed.

Revelation 22:13

I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End.

Psalm 18:3

The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn [1] of my salvation, my stronghold.

Revelation 3:8

I know thy works: behold, I have set before thee an open door, and no man can shut it: for thou hast a little strength, and hast kept my word, and hast not denied my name.

Until next time!

Katina

Episode 75:”The Time is Now” An Interview with Evangelist Bernina Davis: How Obtaining Multiple DUI’s Led to A Divine Appointment with the Creator in Jail & The Ministry of Evangelism-Part 1

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Healing Our Brokenness
Episode 75:"The Time is Now" An Interview with Evangelist Bernina Davis: How Obtaining Multiple DUI's Led to A Divine Appointment with the Creator in Jail & The Ministry of Evangelism-Part 1
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Podcast Transcript Sneak Preview

psychology, alcoholism, mental health, mental health, physical health, deliverance, Joseph, Egypt, podcast, episode 76
Part 1: An Interview with Evangelist Bernina Marbury

There are times in life when things have gotten so bad, that we think that there is no humanly way possible that they could enter the next level of getting worse. And to top it off, sometimes we will boldly say, without realizing the power behind those words, “Things could never get worse than this.” I have said it several times. The unfortunate part of that proclamation is that we don’t have a clue as to what lies wait around the corner. Only God knows the answer as to whether this statement is true or not.

Just as the reality of our family members’ sicknesses are being dealt with, things get worse. Appliances break down. Deaths occur. Friendships dismantle. Our responsibilities as friends, mothers, coworkers, sisters, brothers, spouses, etc., gets ramped up to a whole new level, and we are unsure as to how to proceed.

In the scripture, Joseph was put in a pit, sold, then elevated to living in Pharaoh’s house, then demoted again to prison status, where God’s favor was living with him, and finally, elevated again to second in command over Egypt. The elevation came at a high cost, but, it also came with development of the character needed for God’s divine appointment.

This past Monday, I had the opportunity to interview Evangelist Bernina Marbury. We talked about the importance of relationships and connection, vision, her career path, and blackness. And just when I thought the interview was coming to an end, it was just getting started. Evangelist Nina shared with us how her areas of brokenness led to a divine appointment with God. This appointment was an extended stay in jail, leading to a ministry in evangelism. Click on the link to be blessed by this woman of God.

Podcast Outline

  • Relationships
  • Connection
  • Vision
  • Blackness
  • Brokenness-Evangelist Nina’s Testimony

Scriptures to Meditate on:

Proverbs 29:18

18 Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that keepeth the law, happy is he.

Genesis 39

When Joseph was taken to Egypt by the Ishmaelite traders, he was purchased by Potiphar, an Egyptian officer. Potiphar was captain of the guard for Pharaoh, the king of Egypt.

The Lord was with Joseph, so he succeeded in everything he did as he served in the home of his Egyptian master. Potiphar noticed this and realized that the Lord was with Joseph, giving him success in everything he did. This pleased Potiphar, so he soon made Joseph his personal attendant. He put him in charge of his entire household and everything he owned. From the day Joseph was put in charge of his master’s household and property, the Lord began to bless Potiphar’s household for Joseph’s sake. All his household affairs ran smoothly, and his crops and livestock flourished. So Potiphar gave Joseph complete administrative responsibility over everything he owned. With Joseph there, he didn’t worry about a thing—except what kind of food to eat!

Joseph was a very handsome and well-built young man, and Potiphar’s wife soon began to look at him lustfully. “Come and sleep with me,” she demanded.

But Joseph refused. “Look,” he told her, “my master trusts me with everything in his entire household. No one here has more authority than I do. He has held back nothing from me except you, because you are his wife. How could I do such a wicked thing? It would be a great sin against God.”

10 She kept putting pressure on Joseph day after day, but he refused to sleep with her, and he kept out of her way as much as possible. 11 One day, however, no one else was around when he went in to do his work. 12 She came and grabbed him by his cloak, demanding, “Come on, sleep with me!” Joseph tore himself away, but he left his cloak in her hand as he ran from the house.

13 When she saw that she was holding his cloak and he had fled, 14 she called out to her servants. Soon all the men came running. “Look!” she said. “My husband has brought this Hebrew slave here to make fools of us! He came into my room to rape me, but I screamed. 15 When he heard me scream, he ran outside and got away, but he left his cloak behind with me.”

16 She kept the cloak with her until her husband came home. 17 Then she told him her story. “That Hebrew slave you’ve brought into our house tried to come in and fool around with me,” she said. 18 “But when I screamed, he ran outside, leaving his cloak with me!”

Joseph Put in Prison

19 Potiphar was furious when he heard his wife’s story about how Joseph had treated her. 20 So he took Joseph and threw him into the prison where the king’s prisoners were held, and there he remained. 21 But the Lord was with Joseph in the prison and showed him his faithful love. And the Lord made Joseph a favorite with the prison warden. 22 Before long, the warden put Joseph in charge of all the other prisoners and over everything that happened in the prison. 23 The warden had no more worries, because Joseph took care of everything. The Lord was with him and caused everything he did to succeed.

Exodus 20:3-5

Thou shalt have no other gods before me.

Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth.

Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the Lord thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;

2 Corinthians 7:14

If My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land.

Until next time,

Katina

Episode 73: An Interview with Model, Songwriter, Performing Artist Timothy Horton on Brokenness, Blackness, Balancing Creativity with Authenticity, Studying Languages, Being Homeschooled, & Music

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Healing Our Brokenness
Episode 73: An Interview with Model, Songwriter, Performing Artist Timothy Horton on Brokenness, Blackness, Balancing Creativity with Authenticity, Studying Languages, Being Homeschooled, & Music
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On yesterday, I had the opportunity to interview Timothy Horton. This young man is special because number one, he is a child of God, and then number two, he is my son. When I say that we left no table unturned in our talk, I do mean it. As Timothy mentioned, and we believe at Healing Our Brokenness podcast, “Everybody has a story to tell”. You may laugh some, cry some, and listen attentively as Timothy shares openly about several things, including, but not limited to, the songwriting process, brokenness, music, blackness, relationships, and traveling. In case you missed last week’s podcast episode, you can click here to take a listen.

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Timothy Horton

Episode 73: Podcast Outline

  • Childhood
  • Relationships
  • Important Relationships
  • Blackness
  • Being Homeschooled
  • Music
  • The Effects of the Pandemic
  • Foreign Languages and Communication
  • Mission Trips
  • Traveling
  • Mentors and Mentees
  • Brokenness
  • Unhealed Brokenness
  • Reading of Poetry

Bible Verses to Meditate on:

Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin, to see the plumb line in Zerubbabel’s hand.”

Zechariah 4:10, NLT

Until next time,

Katina

Episode 71: An Interview with Substance Abuse & Addiction Counselor Julianna Sliger on Brokenness, Her Journey, and Substance Abuse

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Healing Our Brokenness
Episode 71: An Interview with Substance Abuse & Addiction Counselor Julianna Sliger on Brokenness, Her Journey, and Substance Abuse
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Substance Abuse plagues every family. No one is exempt. Although it is something that plagues every family, it is not something that we want to talk about. It causes shame, exhaustion, anger, and fear. Addictions leave the same effect, with innocent parties sitting back on edge, waiting to see what happens next. Click here to listen to Substance Abuse & Addictions Counselor Julianna Sliger with her take on Brokenness, Substance Abuse, and Her Journey in General.

Julianna Sliger, substance abuse, addictions, brokenness, emotional health, psychology, mental health, alcoholism, trauma, sexual abuse, triggers, ptsd, broken, brokenness, broken world, podcast, podcaster, podcasting, episode 71, healing our brokenness podcast, katina horton, lifestyle blogger, therapist, mental health professional
Julianna Sliger, Substance Abuse and Addictions Counselor

Podcast Outline:

  • Introduction
  • Julianna Sliger’s Journey
  • Dealing With Substance Abuse / Addictions Clients
  • Brokenness

Bible Verses on Substance Abuse:

1 Peter 5: 8

Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.

1 Corinthians 6:9-11

Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

1 Corinthians 6: 19:20

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

Daniel 1:8

But Daniel resolved that he would not defile himself with the king’s food, or with the wine that he drank. Therefore he asked the chief of the eunuchs to allow him not to defile himself.

Episode 70: The Poison Container

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Healing Our Brokenness
Episode 70: The Poison Container
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How many of you have found yourself being someone else’s poison container? How many of you have tried making someone else your poison container? I know. All this talk of poison and containers sound a little weird. Some people like to use the words punching bags. Same difference. Whether you are the victim or the perpetrator, the whole concept is one that is very unhealthy. Tune in to this week’s podcast episode to find out what happens in both situations.

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Photo by Sarah Pflug at Shopify

Podcast Outline

  • Poison Defined
  • Container Defined
  • Poison Container Defined
  • How it works
  • Workable Solutions

Bible Verses to Ponder On:

Biblical Examples Of Laban and Jacob using Leah as their poison container of deception and past hurt

And Laban gave his servant girl Zilpah to his daughter Leah as her maidservant. 25When morning came, there was Leah! “What have you done to me?” Jacob said to Laban. “Wasn’t it for Rachel that I served you? Why have you deceived me?”26Laban replied, “It is not our custom here to give the younger daughter in marriage before the older.…

Now during the wheat harvest, Reuben went out and found some mandrakes in the field. When he brought them to his mother, Rachel begged Leah, “Please give me some of your son’s mandrakes.”15But Leah replied, “Is it not enough that you have taken away my husband? Now you want to take my son’s mandrakes as well?” “Very well,” said Rachel, “he may sleep with you tonight in exchange for your son’s mandrakes.”…

The Danger of Passing Judgment

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Introduction

We haven’t fully digested it yet, but we love playing God.  We have all shaken our fingers at someone in person, or in our heads.  We have been self-nominated as “The Judge”.  God Himself.  When people like/dislike things differently than us, we wear the black robe and pound the gavel.  “I don’t know why he/she spent $500 on wine and cheese.  They could have bought their children some clothes.  And by the way, did you see what their kids had on for school today?”  

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Photo by Brodie Vissers at Shopify

Danger of Passing Judgment

We judge other people whose sins are different from ours, forgetting that in God’s eyes sin is sin.  We stay stuck on the obvious sins of murder, sex, and blasphemy, and we push aside our idolatry of being in debt over poor spending choices, passive parenting, emotionally angry outbursts, codependency, gossip, lying, and racism.  

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Unfortunately, we have gotten so good at being judge that we take notes, so that we can pour out all of our detective findings to our friends.  It is because our lives are perfect.  Right?  Our kids are perfect.  We are perfect.  We have never made bad decisions that we will never regret for the rest of our lives.  We have never said or thought something racist.  As Christians, we are told to love God with our hearts, soul, mine, and strength, and our neighbors as ourselves.  Satan has blinded us into being legalistic and using two sins to distinguish us from good Christians and bad Christians.  When do we hold up the mirror to ourselves, and truly ask God to reveal our broken parts in these areas. 

Dare any of you, having a matter against another, go to law before the unjust, and not before the saints?

Do ye not know that the saints shall judge the world? and if the world shall be judged by you, are ye unworthy to judge the smallest matters?

Know ye not that we shall judge angels? how much more things that pertain to this life?

If then ye have judgments of things pertaining to this life, set them to judge who are least esteemed in the church.

I speak to your shame. Is it so, that there is not a wise man among you? no, not one that shall be able to judge between his brethren?

But brother goeth to law with brother, and that before the unbelievers.

Now therefore there is utterly a fault among you, because ye go to law one with another. Why do ye not rather take wrong? why do ye not rather suffer yourselves to be defrauded?

Nay, ye do wrong, and defraud, and that your brethren.

Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,

10 Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, 

nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.

11 And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God.

12 All things are lawful unto me, but all things are not expedient: all things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.- 1 Corinthians 6: 1-12

The key lies in verse 11 that helps :  “And such were some of you”, and the words “but ye” are…

It shows how our eyes have been blinded to our own sins.  It leads to legalism and self-righteousness.

Until we have judged someone harshly, and that measurement is given back to us.

Remember the story of David and Bathsheba?  Remember what David said to Nathan in response to the Rich Man’s behavior for stealing the “ewe lamb” from the poor man.  He wanted this man to pay several times over.  And guess what?  That is exactly what happened to David.  The sad background music that played for David was, “You are that man!”

So, what is the antidote for judging?

“Humility and empathy are the antidotes to judging other people and their situations.” 

Katina Horton

Let’s remember this when we are tempted to put on our black robes and wave our fingers at others.  God is waving his finger at us playing the background music entitled, “YOU ARE THAT MAN!”

“For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” Matthew 7:2, NIV