If Only: Living in the Past

if only, regrets, emotional health, mental health, physical health, spiritual health, resolution

if only, regrets, emotional health, mental health, physical health, spiritual health, resolution

“If Only” takes you to the past and leaves you there. It makes friends with “Would have”, “Should Have” and “Could Have”. I am quite sure that you have met them as well. Click and listen to this quick devotional from Coming Out of the Valley: Devotions for Thriving.

Have a blessed Sunday in the Lord!

If Only Meditation Verse

Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 3: 13-14

Suggested Post:

Oh Self-Pity!
Woe is Me!
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Surrender Has Power

surrender, meaning, life, emotional health, mental health, spiritual health, will, control, katina horton, author, blogs, poetry, poem, resolution, give it to God

Background on Surrender: We can’t control it all. We want to know the ending. We feel that we know what is best for us. We can’t understand why God has us waiting for so long. Tired and frustrated with the results of our doing? That’s usually when we give it to God.

Enjoy this poem: Surrender has Power, and if you want to focus on surrender, Check out these two posts:

I’M in Control: The Struggle between Two Wills

The Captain of the Ship

surrender, meaning, life, emotional health, mental health, spiritual health, will, control, katina horton, author, blogs, poetry, poem, resolution, give it to God

Hearing his whispers deep in the dark

Sounding more beautiful than that of the lark

Letting things go and trusting His Will

Communing with God while I’m being still

Comfort of Worship

poetry, Psalms 91, wings, refuge, poem, blogger, blogs, safety, emotional health, mental health, author, calm, shadow, truth, worship, glory, glory of God

There are times when life is challenging. There is no other way to put it. However, when we spend time alone in worship with the Savior, it changes everything. Enter his wings tonight! Feel his presence surround you as we prepare to enter the weekend. God bless!

poetry, Psalms 91, wings, refuge, poem, blogger, blogs, safety, emotional health, mental health, author, calm, shadow, truth, worship, glory, glory of God
Photo by Anthony on Pexels.com

Comfort of Worship

Let me hide in your shadow.

In your wings.

Quite unrattled.

Let me worship in your glory.

Till I make it my own story.

Let me feel your connection.

Through your spirit.

It’s protection.

When the storm seems too much,

Fill my cup.

Need your touch.

Bible Passage to Meditate On:

Psalm 91 King James Version (KJV)

91 He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.

I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust.

Surely he shall deliver thee from the snare of the fowler, and from the noisome pestilence.

He shall cover thee with his feathers, and under his wings shalt thou trust: his truth shall be thy shield and buckler.

Thou shalt not be afraid for the terror by night; nor for the arrow that flieth by day;

Nor for the pestilence that walketh in darkness; nor for the destruction that wasteth at noonday.

A thousand shall fall at thy side, and ten thousand at thy right hand; but it shall not come nigh thee.

Only with thine eyes shalt thou behold and see the reward of the wicked.

Because thou hast made the Lord, which is my refuge, even the most High, thy habitation;

10 There shall no evil befall thee, neither shall any plague come nigh thy dwelling.

11 For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways.

12 They shall bear thee up in their hands, lest thou dash thy foot against a stone.

13 Thou shalt tread upon the lion and adder: the young lion and the dragon shalt thou trample under feet.

14 Because he hath set his love upon me, therefore will I deliver him: I will set him on high, because he hath known my name.

15 He shall call upon me, and I will answer him: I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him, and honour him.

16 With long life will I satisfy him, and shew him my salvation.

Similar Poems for Reflection

Abide My Love, Dance with Me

Warmed and Filled

Renewal

poetry, poem, renewal, refreshed, valley of grace, simple functional grace-filled living, katina horton, poet, refreshing, spiritual health, soul, cleansing

Sometimes depending on what we are dealing with in life, we feel the need for a refreshing from the Spirit of God himself. That is what this poem, Renewal, is all about: God refreshing our souls, and us totally immersed in him. Blessings!

poetry, poem, renewal, refreshed, valley of grace, simple functional grace-filled living, katina horton, poet, refreshing, spiritual health, soul, cleansing
Photo by Samad Deldar on Pexels.com

Renew my heart.

Renew my mind.

Renew my thoughts.

My soul entwined.

Your peace within.

Becomes my friend.

Your love without.

It makes me shout.

My spirit groans.

You make it known.

To God.

He sees.

It’s victory.

Other poems for Reflection:

Released

The Advancer

Gratitude, Gratitude

Gratitude Check

spiritual health, emotional health, character development, trauma, anxiety, PTSD, car accident

Introduction

The last six months have been filled with trials, unexpected trauma, and a whole lot of gratitude.  This gratitude involves the realization that I have life, strength, and decent health.  It makes me think of all the things that God made possible that I thought that I may never do again.  It is also gratefulness for a new calling in life.  I realize that nothing can be taken for granted.

spiritual health, emotional health, character development, trauma, anxiety, PTSD, car accident

Background on Gratitude Check

After just coming out of a trial on Wednesday of last week, I was looking forward to taking it easy on the weekend.  So I thought.  I had just attended a meeting at church for the Sunday School volunteers.  My daughter and I were headed home.

We made a complete stop at the intersection around the corner from our house, waiting for eastbound traffic to clear so that we could make a left turn.  While we were sitting there, I had the words “crash and rental car” to come into my mind.  I tried pushing those thoughts out of my head.  I began to make a plan for what I would do when I got home:  rake the leaves, go for a walk, write out my podcast speech, etc.  The next thing that I knew, we were hit.  It kind of happened in slow motion.

spiritual health, emotional health, character development, trauma, anxiety, PTSD, car accident

After about an hour and fifteen minutes of pictures and paperwork, we were able to go home.  To be honest, I had to stop and ask God “Why?”  I had just recovered from last week’s drama, only to end up with more trauma from the accident.  As I sat there, at my kitchen table, I acknowledged that I was mad.  There was no point in pretending.  Stuffing leads to more trauma, so I wasn’t going down that aisle.  I acknowledged that I didn’t feel like making the calls to the insurance company.  Then, I had to acknowledge the trauma from the accident that was starting to kick in.

spiritual health, emotional health, character development, trauma, anxiety, PTSD, car accident

It took me two more hours before I could call and report the accident.  What was my gratitude check for Saturday?

  1.  God is good.
  2. The car was still drive-able.
  3. We didn’t suffer any major injuries.(My daughter is sore from the accident).
  4. God had a praise song in my head while we waited for all the pictures and paperwork to be done.
  5. The car wasn’t going any faster than it was.
  6. We found out that we were missing some major coverage on our car insurance.
  7. The other driver had insurance.

spiritual health, emotional health, character development, trauma, anxiety, PTSD, car accident

This accident reminded me of God’s answer to our thoughts and our plans:

8 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
“As the heavens are higher than the earth,
    so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.

Isaiah 55:8-9 New International Version (NIV)

God bless,

Katina

Ten things You Need to Bring the Beachside In

Three weeks ago, this article was featured as “Six things that you Need to Bring the Beachside In”.  This post has been updated to reflect “Ten things You Need to Bring the Beachside In. ”  This post may contain affiliate links.  Today is the last day of August.  The last day of the month means preparation for a new month and new beginnings.  In one breath, I can’t believe that today is Friday.  In another breath, it’s been one long week.  I am looking forward to the new things that God has in store for me for the month of September. 

Freebie Giveaway

The end of the month also means one thing here at Valley of Grace:  someone gets a free merchandise freebie.  The deadline to  will be subscribe will be 11:00 p.m., September 1st.  The featured freebie for August is the Weekender Bag that can be used for some of everything.  If you’re at the beach, going away for the weekend, or going to fitness class, the weekender bag is right for you.  It’s the dump everything in it, and go kind of bag.  Adding yourself to the subscriber list puts you in the running for the free merchandise raffle.  Starting tomorrow, I will be sending out “Daily Devotions from Valley of Grace” to all of the email subscribers.  I will still be posting devotions to Valley of Grace’s blog site on our every other week schedule.  Here is a link to where the Weekender Bag can be found.

Valley of Grace weekender bag
weekender front

Valley of Grace weekender bag
weekender back

 

The Beachside  

We’ve all heard of the phrase “Bring the outside In”  when we look at home magazines.  For this purpose, since I love the beach, I decided that I would do a blog post on bringing the beachside in.  When I think of the word beach, I think of my feet in the sand, the water, and God’s big, beautiful sky.

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters; beach, home decor
Beach-My Inspirational Spot

It makes me think about painting the color white on a blank canvas, and then painting the blue sky and water, and tan colored sand.  If I wanted to add to this canvas, other things that come to mind is a pier, a chair for one to sit on, minnows in the water, people, rocks, trees, flowers, etc.  Take a few minutes to think about what your beach would look like.

Now, let’s transfer this canvas to your home.  How can one keep themselves at the beach all year round?  Use a room or two in your home as the beach all year round.  I am including pictures of how I brought the beachside into my bedroom:

  1. Paint:  The walls would represent your canvas.  The first thing that you need is the right color of paint.  Bright, airy colors are needed to bring your beach to life.  For my personal choice, I would have shades of tan, cream, blue, or white.
  2. Pictures:  Pictures tell the story of your home.  They give your home life, and they keep your friends and loved ones close by.  Since this is a beach canvas, people, flowers, trees, sand, rocks, and seashells would be great.  However, this is your canvas, and therein lies the fun.  This is one of my favorite pictures from when my children were little.  They were about one and four years old.  Sometimes when I can’t find the colors that I need, I just paint the frames, as well as the furniture.

beach, home decor, six things you need to bring the beach inside, rocks, sand, wicker chair, bedroom
My kids when they were little

I found the pictures below at Goodwill for $.99 each a few years ago.  I have two sets of two on either side of my bed.

beach, home decor, six things you need to bring the beach inside, rocks, sand, wicker chair, bedroom, family
Flower pictures

beach, home decor, six things you need to bring the beach inside, rocks, sand, wicker chair, bedroom, family
Set of two flower pictures

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters; beach, home decor
Upcycled Canvas Painting with Burlap

The picture below is one of myself, kids when they were little, mom, and grandmother, who is deceased.

beach, home decor, six things you need to bring the beach inside, rocks, sand, wicker chair, bedroom, family
Picture of myself with my son(lower left), kids when they were younger, and mom and grandmother(deceased)

I painted the canvas paintings on the left below.  Three pictures were upcycled and painted over since my color scheme changed.  The pictures of peonies on the left were taken a year ago.  The clothespins and jute string were $1.00 at the Dollar Tree.

 

3.  Furniture: The next thing that you would need would be furniture that would give the beach vibe.  Adirondack, wicker, and bamboo seems to do the trick.  If you have more than one style of chair, that would work out nicely.  A mixture of texture gives rooms more of a natural feel, along with an illusion of more depth.  I was blessed a couple of years ago with the wicker chair below.  Next to the wicker chair is a wrought iron plant stand.  I got rid of the glass top to place the plants on.  It safely holds a journal and wallet that my sister bought me when she visited Europe.  I love this journal, but I have to be careful because it can easily rip since the pages are made out of a linen, natural parchment.

beach, home decor, six things you need to bring the beach inside, rocks, sand, wicker chair, bedroom, family
Wicker chair with Pillow Close-up

beach, home decor, six things you need to bring the beach inside, rocks, sand, wicker chair, bedroom, family
Wicker chair with ottoman

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters; beach, home decor
Coin purse and leaf parchment journal

4. Accessories:   Let’s not forget about the accessories.  In the picture above, I have a couple of books resting on top of the ottoman, a pillow, and fun necklaces that help give the beach vibe.  You can also add mirrors to the wall, as you can see in the picture above, a little bit behind the wicker chair.  The mirror was $6.99 at Goodwill.  I also found this mirror a couple of years ago.

5. Bedding:   Using bedding with the same color scheme of tan, creams, blues, and white,  gives even more of a serene feeling.  I upcycled some of the pillow cases with wool squares that I cut from a scarf.

sewing, upcycle, home decor, DIY, reuse, burlap

6. Plants and Flowers:  The last things that you need are plants.  They can be real or fake.  Hanging terrariums are a nice accent.  Using a combination of hanging and non-hanging plants makes your room look even more inviting.

beach, home decor, six things you need to bring the beach inside, rocks, sand, wicker chair, bedroom, family, iron plant stand
Flower with Candle

I found the fake plant above at Good will for 3.99.  The candle was on sale at Michael’s for $2.00 during one of their lowest prices of the season.  It smells just like the beach.

beach, home decor, six things you need to bring the beach inside, rocks, sand, wicker chair, bedroom, family, iron plant stand
Close-up of Terrarium

beach, home decor, six things you need to bring the beach inside, rocks, sand, wicker chair, bedroom, family, iron plant stand
Terrarium with jute rope

The cream colored flowers below are sitting in a mason jar of rocks. They were $1.00 from Dollar Tree.

beach, home decor, six things you need to bring the beach inside, rocks, sand, wicker chair, bedroom, family, iron plant stand
Creme flowers inside mason jar with pebbles

7. Wood Ladder

Wood Ladders can be a great addition to any room.  I love the idea of using wood ladders for a paint studio.    In this kind of setting, you can use the ladder to display and store paint, paint brushes, paint smocks, and even a second drop cloth for messy hands.  They are also great for displaying books, flowers, towels in bathrooms, blankets, etc.  Another thing about wood ladders is that they give a natural effect against a wood wall.

8.  Drop Cloth Canvas Curtains

Just looking at drop cloth canvas reminds me of the sand at the beach.  The wonderful thing about drop cloth is that it has the natural look of linen, but it’s not the linen price.  It is forgiving, and very easy to wash.  The drop cloth in this picture is attached to plumbing materials for a little bit of an industrial look.  I use drop cloth for tablecloths, background prop for pictures, and it can even be used to make bed skirts and tree skirts.  By the way, I do love linen!

 

beach, ladder

9.  DIY Wood Signs

In order to make my craft/painting area more beachy, I decided to make wooden signs.  I went to Menards and ordered two 6 foot pieces of lumber for $3.00, and then had them to cut each piece into three more pieces.  They charge $1 for every additional cut after three cuts.  I used black paint that I already have at home, along with a small jar of acrylic paint that I bought from Michaels for $.99.  Whatever makes you think beachy, is what can be written on the signs.  These signs are displayed over the walkways and over doors.

beach, wood signs

The one below is my favorite.  Painting these signs was also therapeutic.

beach, wood signs

10.  DIY Word Art

Last, but not least, you can using any material that you have at home, along with jute string, clothespins, and push pins, to hang up any word art signs.  In the picture below, I used some burlap tags that I had purchased from Michaels.  They had a box on clearance for $2.00.  My paint/craft area is small, but just the right space to get away inside.  I need to use it even more.

Have a blessed rest of your weekend!

He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.

Psalms 23:2, KJV

God’s Timing is Everything

Reminders about God and HIs Timing

flowers, God's timing, beach, reminders

flowers, God's timing, beach, reminders

Ecclesiastes 3:11 “He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man’s heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end.”

flowers, God's timing, beach, reminders

flowers, God's timing, beach, reminders

Today is a dreary, damp day.  However, I can look at these pictures and be reminded of how beautiful the last two days were.  The weather was perfect for hiking, walking, bicycling, picnicking, you name it.  There were about four different times on yesterday in the midst of my crazy, busy day, and long list of things to do, that I kept telling myself that it was time for me to take a walk, stretch my legs, decompress, get some fresh air, and just bask in God’s goodness.  It was also a day of struggles with perfectionism trying to reign, and me talking myself down, taking deep breaths, and reminding myself, “Rest in God. His grace is enough.  God will give you the grace to get the things done that you need to get done, and then everything else is tomorrow’s grace.”  My mind and spirit knew this.  However, the trauma started talking, and wanted me giving in to the overall shaky feeling that my body was having.

flowers, God's timing, beach, reminders

I took three books to the train station library, and then grabbed one to bring home.  My new rule is that if books are coming in, some have to be going out.  When I left out of the station, I decided to do what I had been planning for two weeks now:  take pictures of the flowers.  After taking these pictures, I decided to walk to the beach, and the water was absolutely beautiful.  Of course, I couldn’t just enjoy the view.  It was so pretty out, that I had to take some more pictures.

flowers, God's timing, beach, reminders

As I walked home, eager to do my last thing on the “To Do” list, I heard the screech of a door behind me.  I jumped.  Someone called my name.  It was a friend of mine from my Mom’s group, who happened to see me walking past as she was talking to her children.  She invited me to have dinner with them, and then I walked on home afterwards.  God’s timing is perfect.  If I had gone to the beach any earlier or later, I would have missed this fellowship and blessing of dinner.  I also needed the reminder from God to slow down, and take a deep breath, and really, truly smell the flowers.  I hope you have a wonderful weekend!

flowers, God's timing, beach, reminders flowers, God's timing, beach, reminders

Blessings!

Katina

The Fear Aspect: Living with and Healing from Trauma on a Daily Basis

For the next two weeks, I am going to do a quick series on the ins and outs of living with trauma on a daily basis.  I am not sure how many of you have dealt with trauma in the past or present, however, it is something that is more prevalent than one may think, and a lot of fears have trauma at the root of it. 

trauma, healing, grief, fear, anxiety, mental health, PTSD
Photo by Kat Jayne on Pexels.com

Women at 10.4 %, are twice as likely as men to experience PTSD.  About 8 million adults have PTSD during a given year. This is only a small portion of those who have gone through a trauma.  I have been living with trauma all my life, unbeknownst to me. 

What I didn’t realize is that a lot of my trauma manifested itself as fear during my younger years.  After having compounded trauma within the last six and a half years, this fear effect gets multiplied.  Unfortunately, when this happens, we can definitely pray, and start to take deep breaths to help ourselves calm down.  However, the fear is so strong, that you would think that you are in an all out fight for your life.  The fear gets multiplied by fifty.

trauma, healing, grief, fear, anxiety, mental health, PTSD
Photo by Shashank Kumawat on Pexels.com

About three years ago, my kids were at youth group at church, and a tornado swept through parts of the town where I lived, along with some of the other nearby towns.  I was at home by myself.  Praise God for community!  My friends and I texted and called one another to make sure that everyone was okay.  This discussion took place as I stood in the bathroom with the door closed, begging God for the weather to pass over.  

My mother called to check on me since she heard that the tornado was headed our way.  I could tell by the sound of her voice that she was nervous.  I called the kids at church, and they stated that one of the youth leaders, who was a fireman, told them where to go, and what to do.  I knew that they would be fine, but I kept wondering if I would be okay.  The townhome that I was living in was surrounded by large evergreens on all sides.  I kept thinking to myself, if they were just here, then I would be okay.

trauma, healing, grief, fear, anxiety, mental health, PTSD
Photo by Demeter Attila on Pexels.com

Deep down, I knew that my kids couldn’t control God’s weather.  However, I knew that it would make the out of control fear that trauma had placed on me to loosen up.  I shifted between being okay, and feeling like my whole entire body had been tied up because my muscles were so tense.

Thank God that the weather did let up.  The tornado didn’t hit my side of town, but it did hit all around the church.  God protected the church.  All the while, as I stood there in that bathroom, God had praise music going in my head.  I knew that it was his sign that everything would be okay.  However, because of the fear from trauma, I must be honest, my body was saying a different story.  My kids made it home safely that night, and it was just another testament to God’s faithfulness, as trees had been knocked down everywhere from the tornado.

Have a blessed night!

Katina

Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning. Lamentations 3:23, NLT

The Story of Joseph

I love the story of Joseph, and I love how God’s favor was all over his life.  When I think about Joseph’s coat, it makes me think about my favorite coat as a kid.  It was coral blue with a red heart just below each shoulder.  I called it my “Heart to Heart” coat.  It is good to know that even when we are in our worst of times, God’s favor can still rise above the situation.  God can still put us in situations where people are doing things for us, and they don’t even know why they are doing them.  Praise God for his favor!

joseph, prayer, poetry, prison, favor, God
Photo by lalesh aldarwish on Pexels.com

Coat of Favor
 
It was Joseph, it was Joseph, he had favor don’t you see,
It was favor from our God from the Lord Almighty.
 
Coat of favor, coat of favor, filled with stripes, awe, and wonder.
Filled with power from his dreams that the brothers would bow under.
 
Feeling lost, hurt, rejected from our daddy don’t you know?
He can’t stay here …let’s just kill him, he can’t stay here… he must go!
 
Sold in slavery, faked his death to our father, and he grieved.
Oh thank goodness… he is gone, and we are granted our reprieve.
 
God of Joseph, Slave of Pharaoh, gave him elevated power.
Wife of Pharaoh, full of needy, stripped it all within the hour.
 
Put in prison, with the baker and cupbearer of the king.
Placed in charge by the warden, God’s good favor it would bring.
 
These two prisoners, had their dreams told, to them then, right by Joseph.
Don’t forget me, with the king, need release from this low self.
 
They forgot him, yes they did, till the king had his dream.
Couldn’t sleep, someone help, can you tell me what it means?
 
Oh yes, Joseph, he can help you…he can tell you what it means.
Oh no, God, he’s the Father and interpreter of dreams.
 
Oh then, Joseph, oh yes Joseph, told the king what would happen
You’re released, you’re promoted, get this plan right and mapping.
 
And he did, with God’s help, he saved Egypt from the famine
Saved his brothers, Growth in character, and his faith, as you imagine.

joseph, prayer, poetry, prison, favor, God
Photo by Donald Tong on Pexels.com

The Lord was with Joseph, and he was a successful man; and he was in the house of his master the Egyptian. And his master saw that the Lord was with him and that the Lord made all he did to prosper in his hand. So Joseph found favor in his sight, and served him. Then he made him overseer of his house, and all that he had he put under his authority. So it was, from the time that he had made him overseer of his house and all that he had, that the Lord blessed the Egyptian’s house for Joseph’s sake; and the blessing of the Lord was on all that he had in the house and in the field. Thus he left all that he had in Joseph’s hand, and he did not know what he had except for the bread which he ate.

Genesis 39: 2-6, NKJV

 

Dedication to Mudear

Everybody has a name that is special to them when they think of their grandmother.  For me and my family, my grandmother was always referred to as Mudear.  Yesterday was her birthday, and if she were alive, we would have been celebrating.  Her death occurred a little over five years, right when I was at the height of a series of traumatic events going on.  Due to trauma, sometimes it seems like it was just yesterday that she died, and other times it seems like it has been longer. 

Mudear was the pillar of the family.  She taught us how to enjoy life by doing the simple things.  She didn’t wear fancy clothes or buy fancy things.  She wasn’t afforded this luxury, and even if she was, it wouldn’t have been her.  She liked wearing her “house dresses”, as she called them, scarves tied on her head, getting her long fingernails polished, and watching her favorite television shows.

family time, importance, trauma, God, death, grandma, Mudear, simplicity, grace

We were graced by a woman who showed us what it meant to have community.  On any given day, she would stretch six dollars to feed us for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, along with there being the job of several trips back and forth to the local meat market by my cousin and I.  She welcomed people from all walks of life into her home, and even with all the drama that went on, we knew that there was nothing that dancing, singing, and good old laughs couldn’t cure.  She loved her children, and having all of her grandkids around her.  There was joy in simplicity at its finest.

Mudear wasn’t one who had to raise her voice in order to get her point across.  She just used her old sayings from the South.  If you looked nice, she’d say, ” You look sharper than Dick was when Hattie died.”  If you sat inappropriately as a young lady, she’d say, “You are sitting mighty high”.  If you didn’t clean up behind yourself, she’d say, ” Oh, you must have thought today was your birthday.”     

The holidays at Mudear’s house were filled with music, dressing, turkey, ham, macaroni and cheese, and let’s not forget her homemade four layer chocolate banana cakes, coconut pineapple cakes, and caramel with pecan cakes.  Although we all miss you, we know that the love you shared will never be forgotten.  Thank you God for gracing us with Mudear.