In case you missed our last episode, “The Sin of Cynicism-Part 2”, you can find that episode here. Today’s episode, Episode 27, is entitled Simply Grace. I hope that you enjoy this special poetry reading.
Simply Grace Podcast Outline:
Dissection of Topics and Reading of Poetry
Welcome to the Healing Our Brokenness Podcast Episode 27:
Simply Grace. The intro and ending song
that you hear on the podcast is entitled “Valley of Grace” and is song by
Timothy Horton. Today is a special episode. Why is that?
I will be ready poetry from a book that I published back in February
entitled, “Simply Grace”. It is
available on Amazon. Simply Grace is a
compilation of simple, healthy recipes that are mostly non-meat, along with
poetry that tackles tough issues that we face every day. However, these issues are seasoned with
grace. I deal with truth, so that the truth
brings healing. We are set free by
true. I also deal with raw emotions.
The first poem, entitled “The Quench” deals with Approval
Reading of the poem
The next poem, entitled “The Source of Self-Worth” dissects
our need for self-worth, and not just the need, but the struggle to get it from
things, rather than the main source.
Reading of the poem
The next poem, entitled” Coat of Favor” deals with the Life
of Joseph, his trials, and his redemption.
Reading of the Poem
Have you ever taken matters into your own hands, instead of
waiting on God? The next poem deals with
just that. It is entitled, “Oh, The Pain
Reading of the Poem
For those of us who have been through abuse, we must relearn
what love is. That is what” Abide My
Love, Dance with Me” is all about: God’s love poured out on me to reshape my
thoughts on abuse. Secondly, it describes
how I danced with my Heavenly Father during a period of trials and financial despair,
and how God “showed me his back” as his showed Moses, so to speak, by allowing
me to feel his presence for several hours.
Reading of the Poem
The last poem, “I am the Vine, And So Is It Time?” deals with
a combination of things: the Crucifixion
of Jesus on the Cross, John 15, and the Clematis vine that I attempted to tie
to the trellis last spring as I was getting bit by mosquitos. The first time that I attempted this adventure,
there were too many mosquitos out. The second and final time I was finally able
to do it. However, just within the few
days of break in between, the clematis vine had completely wrapped itself around
one of the heucheras. It was a wonderful
way to see the scriptures in action.
Reading of the Poem
Thank you for listening to Episode 27: Simply Grace, and if
you are enjoying the Healing Our Brokenness Podcast, please recommend a friend,
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The Potter-This poem depicts the awesome work of our Creator, God himself. He is going to keep working on us, if we allow him to be in control instead of us trying to take the reigns. If you didn’t read my last poem, “Refusal to Heal”, you can find that one here.
We will disappointment others, and others will disappointment us. Whatever the case may be, disappointments can take us on a whirlwind of emotions, processing, and more emotions, and processing. It can leave us in a cave of events, and shame if we continue ruminating over each thing that happened, instead of processing the events for healing purposes.
This poem was written to bring comfort to those individuals who deal with PTSD/trauma on a daily basis, and they feel like they’re in the “Stuck Aspect” of Trauma. Although we feel like we are trapped, we know that God’s presence is always there. It is a representation of the dialog between the trauma impacted individual and God himself.
“I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit, He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit, He prunes it so that it may bear more fruit. 3 You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you. 4 Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself unless it abides in the vine, so neither can you unless you abide in Me. 5 I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing. 6If anyone does not abide in Me, he is thrown away as a branch and dries up; and they gather them, and cast them into the fire and they are burned.
Stuck Inside Message of Hope
7 If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples. 9 Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love. 10 If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. 11 These things I have spoken to you so that My joy may be in you, and that your joy may be made full.
There is nothing worse than feeling stuck. Literally stuck! Sometimes we have a zipper that is stuck. When it happens, it is usually when we are in a hurry. So, what we do is to keep pulling and tugging on the zipper, creating a worse situation. Then, we pull long where we end up with extra material in the way of the zipper, and the next thing you know, we have a ripped coat and a stuck zipper.
How about being stuck in an elevator? I don’t like elevators myself, and so the thought of being stuck on one just makes me feel claustrophobic and helpless. And of course, for people who have been stuck on elevators, their first reaction is to panic. Lastly, what about feeling stuck in a relationship? There is nothing worse than feeling powerless, and not realizing that you do have options. However, you have grown so used to dysfunction, that you don’t know what it is even like to exert boundaries, and explore these options.
Today’s topic, “The Stuck Aspect”, deals with a dissociated state of trauma. In this state you end up feeling helpless, trapped, and not sure of how to proceed, where to go, or when to go. We will explore two aspects of this state: the stuck inside and the stuck outside aspect.
STuck Outside Aspect
The Stuck Outside aspect of trauma is when you are dissociating, and having an experience where you are “outside” of yourself. This experience makes you feel like you are watching yourself as if you are watching a movie, but you are not part of the movie where all of you is integrated together.
I first experienced this when I was living at my last place of residence, and trauma was reigning, and in the forefront of my life. Basically, I was in survival mode. I hadn’t done much work in the area of healing because of being afraid to face my feelings, possible retraumatization, and fear. I had all of this going on coupled with the fact that I had just been released from working in a toxic environment for nine months. When it happened, I felt out of control, and I started feeding more into it, with the anxiety from trauma escalating.
It continued to occur when I moved to the residence that I am living at now. However, I realized how to manage the symptoms better. Instead of panicking more, I started to remind myself that I was fine, and of the status of my present surroundings and situation. This created a calm inside of my brain, and then it would pass.
Stuck Inside Aspect
The stuck inside aspect deals with you feeling like you are trapped inside of your body. People on the outside can see from your facial expression, or the lack thereof, that something is wrong, but they aren’t sure of how to handle it. You feel like your whole body has gone stiff as a board, and you can tell that your eyes are doing something weird. This might sound strange, but I have also noticed that since having trauma, eating certain foods can bring this on.
I was at a worship service with a friend right before Christmas a couple of years ago, and it happened right after I’d finishing eating. I could tell that she was trying to figure out what was going on, because I saw her staring into my eyes, trying to figure out if I was okay. Once again, I grounded myself in my location, and in the present moment, and I told myself that I would be fine, that it had happened before, and to just let it pass. It eventually passed. However, it had definitely caught me off guard.
Have you ever found yourself in the “Stuck Inside” or “Stuck Outside” Aspect of trauma. And if so, what did you do to calm yourself down? What was the reaction of others around you? Would love to hear your thoughts!
When we think of separation, it brings up pain and sadness. However, when we are separated for the cause of Christ, it changes everything. For to live is Christ, and to die is gain. We have the Father’s love to guide us as we run our race of endurance.