This poem was written as a reflection of some of the different ways in which God speaks to us. We like to put God in a box. We often forget that God has an infinite way of relating to us, and allowing us to hear his voice. When Elijah was in the process of running away from Jezebel, God revealed Himself to him. Elijah had put God in the box of coming to him in a “great and mighty way”. Instead, he whispered to him in the still, small voice. God knows what we need, and when we need it. He is a God who meets us right where we’re at.
He Speaks! He Speaks!
But where will it be?
In a message, in a song, or the birds in a tree?
Will it be in the coolness of the wind blowing at night?
Will it be in the calmness of the crickets singing in flight?
Will it be in the morning when the rabbits talk to squirrels?
Or the munks tunneling through grass, and the robins dancing a twirl?
Will it be in the waves that are splashing at the beach?
Or the smiles of the saints as they’re waving “Hi” to me?
Will it be in the sun that is setting in the sky?
Or the swans overhead that are reaching by and by?
When he speaks, will I hear him, same voice as before?
Episode 45: Be Still: The Healing Aspect of Living with Trauma Healing Our Brokenness Podcast Seri...
00:00 / 00:14:52
Be Still Podcast Outline
Definition of Still
Definition of Know
Dissection of Psalm 46: 10
What Happens With the Combo of Trauma and Constant Busyness
Good afternoon! Welcome to Healing Our Brokenness, episode 45,
Entitled, “Be Still:” The Healing Aspect of Living with Trauma on a Daily Basis”
What does it mean to be still?
Being still means without movement, without speech, calm,
I like to think of stillness as the act of eliminating busyness
In Psalm 46: 10, God tells us, “Be still and know that I am
To know means to be aware of through information and observation. For us to know something or someone, we must
spend time with that person or learning about that topic. If we want to know
God, we must quiet our spirits, stop the striving, distractions, busyness, and
do what is required to be in a relationship with him. If we want to heal from
trauma, we also need a stillness to exist.
This stillness required from healing that helps us to know
about our mind and body connection, can only happen when we purposefully have 2
things: time and space.
When we are busy every minute of the day, we don’t have time
to know our bodies. Our bodies reveal the secrets behind our emotions. Just recently, and recently being about 3
months ago, I started working a full-time job. After a month, I realized that I
needed to tweak my schedule for the weekend. I had to block out 3 hours on my weekend
mornings in order to make sure that I could continue having my time of
stillness. Without stillness, it is hard to gain clarity.
Before working full time, I had more time and space for this
stillness to occur. Now, since my schedule has changed, i must be more
intentional about giving myself margin.
Right before starting work with this job, I had a traumatic
event to occur. Along with learning new things at work, and relearning how to
drive after 30 years, I was exhibiting “ADHD-like” trauma symptoms, and having
a hard time focusing. I knew that it was
only a matter of time till the emotional effects of this event would come out. My
system had to be relaxed enough with stillness, and time and space to go
through the steps of processing everything that had gone down.
The first symptom that was exhibited was that of nausea. I
knew immediately that this was grief. And how was I able to tell that? Four
years ago, when I was living at my previous residence , I became very nauseated
one evening after eating. It was the
worst case ever. I thought that I was
coming down with the flu or some type of virus. It was also during this time
that I had not begun to process any of the traumatic events that had occurred in
the previous 3 years. My system was on
emotional and mental overload.
All of a sudden, before I knew it, I ended up regurgitating 3
to 4 times. In between each time, I felt like I needed to cry very deeply. This
is how I was able to make the connection that nausea for me equals the need for
grief to be released from my body. At
the time, my son asked me about the contents of what I ate that could have made
me so sick. I told him that I realized that it had nothing to do with the food
that I ate.
When I told my therapist about what happened, she said, “Yes,
this was definitely physiological.”
Another symptom that occurred recently is where my lips started
to become numb. I knew immediately that
this represented anger that I needed to work through. Once again, if I did not have the time within
the last few years to process some of the trauma, I would not have had a clue of
what was going on. I probably would have
gotten myself all worked up and anxious, perpetuating the problem.
I was then able to go to God and ask him, “What is this
anger about? Is it just this traumatic event, or something else along with it?”.
Having my time of stillness, and space for reflection allowed me to get to the
root of the problem so that I could start healing from, it. That anger had been coming out sideways for about
2 1/2 weeks.
Music is one of my main go-to’s for enabling me to process
trauma , and so when I added more of this into my time and space, I gained even
more wisdom and discernment , along with being able to release the grief from
my system through crying heavily.
Changes are good. However,
changes are only fully embraced once the old has been grieved. All of the “would
haves”, “should haves”, and “not any more’s”. If you are having problems
healing from trauma, ask yourself if you are allowing yourself the time and
space of sitting in God’s stillness. The
pain, loneliness, and loss have to be grieved. I don’t want to mislead you. There
will be pain in this process. There’s no way to go around it. And I promise
you, if there was, everyone would be signing up for it. There is God’s grace,
mercy, and presence there. And it is
very much needed. It is also in this stillness that our mind, body, soul, and
spirit will begin to reveal the answers to our questions. It will help us to
lead the way and or continue our journey to a life of thriving.
First, try starting off with one hour of lying down without
any distractions and see if you can notice the difference of what this new
stillness brings. Initially, it will feel very uncomfortable because you will
want to quickly fill up your time with busyness. However, this quiet time will
begin to declutter your mind and allow you to get to the root of your issues, along
with the help a therapist.
I hope that “Episode 45: ‘Be Still: The Healing Aspect Of
Living With Trauma’” has been beneficial to you in some way. If Healing Our
Brokenness is making a difference in your life, please leave a review, tag a
friend, and give a shout out on social media. God bless! Have a wonderful week!
Episode 44: Remembering the Sabbath Healing Our Brokenness Podcast Seri...
00:00 / 00:10:42
Remembering the Sabbath Podcast Outline
Meaning of Sabbath
My Childhood Sabbath
Why Did God Create the Sabbath
Welcome to Healing Our Brokenness Episode 44: Remembering the Sabbath.
What does the word Sabbath mean?
Sabbath means to rest or to
cease. Sunday, the Sabbath, was my
favorite day of the week as a child. It
still is. It was a time when I knew that
I had that “rest easy” deep down in my soul kind of feeling. Sundays could be enjoyed to the fullest
because Saturday was used as a preparation day to deal with meals, clothes,
hair, cleaning, and laundry. On Sundays,
we went to church for a good portion of the day, and if there were no other
programs going on at church, we bought a soul food meal from the church, along
with pop and pound cake and headed home.
Other times, we stopped at the grocery store’s deli department to pick
up Kaiser rolls, crab meat or tuna, and muffins. The rest of the day was filled with reading,
listening to music, and enjoying family time.
Why did God
create the Sabbath? God created the
Sabbath for our benefit. God didn’t need
to rest, but he rested on the Sabbath as an example to us, to remember to take
time out to worship and rest in Him on this holy day: “Then God blessed the seventh day and
sanctified it, because in it He rested from all His work which God had
created and made.” (Genesis 2:3, NASB)
Another reason why God created the Sabbath is
to make sure that we don’t go back into a slavery mentality: “Remember that you were
slaves in Egypt and that the Lord your God brought you
out of there with a mighty hand and an outstretched arm. Therefore
the Lord your
God has commanded you to observe the Sabbath day.” (Deuteronomy 5: 15,
NIV) When you are slaves, there are no
breaks. You’re constantly on the
move. You wear yourselves out to the
point of exhaustion. Sabbath puts a
boundary around this mentality.
Observing Sabbath demonstrates to God that we know he is more than
capable of giving us the strength and endurance that we need to get things done
during the remaining six days. It forces
us to meditate on the fact that God’s gift of freedom given to us via the cross
Thank you for the
Sabbath. Thank you for the realization
that we don’t have to work ourselves to the point of exhaustion in order to
keep up. We praise you for your
promises, and the freedom that only you can give.
In your name we
Thank you for listening to Healing Our Brokenness Episode 44: Remembering the Sabbath. Have a blessed week!
It is amazing how we are all are wired up differently, and with this wiring, we all have different things that take us back to childhood. For the last few nights, I have been taking a quick five minute walk in the neighborhood in order to get a whisp of the slightly cool, fresh air and to hear the sound of the crickets. These two things have been my favorite since I was a kid. They remind me of visiting my relatives in Memphis and hearing the calming effect of the crickets at night.
About a week ago, I was trying to decide what to make for dinner. My mind landed on the box of pasta that was still in the cabinet. I decided to jazz it up with my two favorite ingredients for most meals: spinach and diced tomatoes.
Here is the recipe:
Total Prepping and Cooking Time:
1 box of penne pasta
2 jars of tomato and basil pasta sauce
1 tablespoon of thyme
3 tablespoons of parsley
1 can of diced tomatoes
1 can of cut-leaf spinach
1/3 cup of quinoa
1/4 cup of oil
Boil a pot of water, adding the oil to the water to prevent the pasta from sticking.
Add the pasta and the quinoa once the water has started boiling.
While the pasta and quinoa are cooking, saute the spinach and diced tomatoes.
Drain the pasta and quinoa in a colander and dump them back into the pot.
Dump all the rest of the ingredients into the pot and stir.
Eat and enjoy!
Food for thought:
What foods do you eat, or activities do you participate in that take you back to your childhood? Would love to hear your comments!
Are you walking in the freedom of Christ? What are we refusing to let go of as a result of someone else’s unhealed brokenness? What did someone say or do to us to make us want to keep hustling for self-worth? Why do we continue to void out the cause of the cross? What are some coping mechanisms/survival strategies/weird behaviors have you found yourself in because you are still trying to prove to your offender/person who hurt you, that you are enough? Would love to hear your comments!
Episode 42: Lessons from the Vine-Part 1 Healing Our Brokenness Podcast Seri...
00:00 / 00:10:00
Lessons from the Vine Outline
Conversation with Coworker
Application to our lives
Good afternoon everyone!
Welcome to Healing our Brokenness episode 42, entitled, Lessons
from the Vine”. Have you ever received a lesson from a vine? What about the
illustration that God gives us in his word regarding the vine and the branches?
“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in
you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.
This past week I was talking to a coworker of mine about how the flowers in my
front yard, the side of the house, and in the backyard were doing something weird
this year. It is as if they were confused due to a combination of lack of sun, cold
temperatures in May and June, and a variety of other reasons.
There were 2 flowers that we discussed. One is a vine, and the other is a burning
bush. The one that I will dissect today
is that of the burning bush. The burning
bush sits in front of my house. It literally has 4 different things going on
with it. The first situation is that there were some branches were no leaves were
produced. The second situation that was
going on was that there were branches with leaves that produced and is thriving.
The next situation that is going on is that some leaves were thriving but are
now dead. And the last situation was one
in which some of the Leaves had started turning their burgundy color as if fall
was approaching already. I decided to cut
off the dead withered leaves.
She brought it to my attention that it could be a perfect illustration
for our lives. Here is what God gave me as a lesson from the burning bush. There
are certain areas of our lives that are dead. They need to be cut out. The second lesson is
that there are some areas in our lives where we are trying to move too fast instead
of going through the process that God has for us. This could be due to seeing
others thriving and excelling in their businesses etc. The 3rd lesson from the burning bush is that
there are some areas in our lives that are right on target and maturing properly.
The last lesson from the burning bush is that there are areas of our lives where
immaturity exists, and therefore, there is no growth at all. These are the
areas that God wants to prune so that we can produce fruit and continue to grow.
Which one of these lessons do you identify with? I’m quite
sure that we can find a little bit of ourselves in each one of them. Let’s be
mindful of the areas that need growth, areas that are moving too fast, areas
that are dead, and the areas that are growing in maturity in Christ just fine.
Thank you for listening to “Healing Our Brokenness, episode
42, “Lessons from the Vine”. God bless
and have a wonderful week!
When we think of separation, it brings up pain and sadness. However, when we are separated for the cause of Christ, it changes everything. For to live is Christ, and to die is gain. We have the Father’s love to guide us as we run our race of endurance.
When things are predictable, we feel safe, secure, and at ease. We are not God, and thus, the truth of the matter is that not everything in life will be predictable. However, when unpredictability becomes your norm, then it can be the perfect recipe for disaster. If you already have a history of PTSD or trauma, then after a round of unpredictability at its finest, you will be in line for more.
I was young, in my 20s, married, a full-time employee and a full-time student. And although I was very busy, and I did feel stress because of it, it wasn’t anything major. Out of the blue, everything changed. I went from doing all of the above to running to the emergency room and/or doctor’s office once or twice a week. Unpredictability rocked my world to put it mildly.
The symptoms started off with a racing heart. My ex-husband dropped me off in front of our apartment building one night so that I could get settled, and he could continue driving around to find a park. My heart started racing like crazy. I remember thinking to myself, “What is going on?” It finally stopped by the time that I got upstairs.
A couple of weeks after that, on my 24th birthday to be exact, I was standing in front of the copy machine at work when I started feeling excruciating chest pains. One of my coworkers rushed me to the ER in her car. They didn’t find anything.
However, after that, every few days there was a new symptom occurring: extremely high blood pressure, racing pulse, hammer-pounding headaches that made you long for heaven, diarrhea, an unsafe drop in weight, fibromyalgia,etc. It got to the point where my belts were no longer able to keep my pants up.
Days turned into weeks and weeks into months as the physician ran every kind of blood test that he could think of. On one particular occasion, I was blow drying my hair, when all of a sudden, my heart and pulse starting racing as if it was going to beat out of my chest, and then my entire body started twitching. I finished blow drying my hair and headed to the ER. My mother, my ex-husband, and some other family members met me there.
As soon as my ex-husband saw me with my hair just blow dried and no curls, he stated, ” You couldn’t have done anything to your hair?” It was one of those moments when you stared in shock, cognitive dissonance sets in, and then you pretend like you didn’t hear what you just heard.
This vibrant twenty year-old, straight “A” student who was able to do it all suffered a time-out. I ended up having to drop two of my classes. The exhaustion and insomnia wouldn’t allow me to keep up.
Finally, during one particular visit to my physician, I gave in and told him that I was feeling depressed. He said that it was just the stress. My reply was, “Something is wrong with me.” He listed everything that he had done already, and then he said, ” How about we check your thyroid?”
In no time, I got the results. Bingo! I had hyperactive thyroid. Better known as Graves disease. I finally had an answer for this madness. I was happy and feeling blessed. However, that didn’t last long when I found out that it would take about four months before I would start feeling better.
I decided upon the “Radioactive Cocktail” as my method of treatment. A lady who worked in the nuclear medicine department gave me the best advice ever. She told me not to be surprised if my condition reverses because of medicine not being an “exact science”. It was the same thing that had happened to her.
At first, I was mad, and wondering why she would say something like this. However, I soon realized that it was the best advice ever because I was prepared. Just like she forewarned, my thyroid condition went normal, and then reversed to the other side, better known as hypothyroidism.
Four months later, I was back to my normal self so it seemed. However, the unpredictability of trips to the doctor and ER led me to develop compounded trauma. I already had childhood trauma under my belt. Then were was the trauma of being in a toxic relationship, a verbally abusive job, and my physical health was now added to that list.
If I had to look back at that twenty-four year old woman, I would tell her what I now know: “Breathe! Allow yourself to feel the feelings! When you don’t allow yourself to feel the feelings of overwhelm, your body will take it on. The stress has to go somewhere. Let it out! Nothing is worth your health. Community is everything. God is enough!”
Episode 16: The Comparison Trap Healing Our Brokenness Podcast Seri...
00:00 / 00:18:29
In case you missed our last podcast episode, The Sin of Complaining, you can find it here. Today’s podcast deals with the Comparison Trap. It is the issue that is ripping families, churches, and friendships apart. Yet, we still can’t seem to find a way to get out of it. Let’s explore the topic a little bit further to see how destructive it can be, and what solutions we can implement in order to get out of it.